Sunday, December 02, 2007

Breaking Up (with the PS3) Is Hard To Do

Dear PS3,
.
Hey, how ya doing? Its been awhile since we've talked hasn't it? Yeah, things have been a little off since we got together a year ago and that's why I'm writing this letter. I should have written this months ago but like the old saying goes, breaking up is hard to do. That's right PS3, I'm sorry to say it but I'm just not that into you.
.
Its not that I didn't try. When we first met it was so exciting. You were so beautiful and curvy. You even smelled nice. You came with some baggage (that crappy Talladega Nights movie) but I quickly got over it and we started to have some fun together. Sadly, the fun didn't last. There just wasn't that much to you and I quickly lost interest. I kept looking for something for us to have in common but lets face it, there wasn't much I couldn't get from you that I couldn't get from someone else that was better or much cheaper. I know that's a horrible thing to hear but I just want to be honest. I was looking for something unique and special and you're not it. You just don't stand out and I can't wait until your online service or Solid Snake finally show up to save us because that probably won't be enough. Look, I'm sure there are others who will find you attractive but I have to move on. In fact, I already have.
.
Before I started seeing you I was spending alot of time with the Xbox 360 and there are no signs of that stopping. Sixy (that's my pet name for her, isn't it cute?) and I have had our share of problems (there was this one instance with these red rings that I thought would be the end of us) but we've worked things out and its been great. Then last year, around the time I met you, I met yet another console called Wii. She's a cute little thing and has kind of become a little sister to the 360. As you can see PS3, I have a nice little family here. A console for me and a console for the kids and wife, there just isn't a place for you. I know I've had a long history with you and your family so don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for all you've done for me. But the fact of the matter is relationships are a two way street. I'm willing to give you my time and money but if you have nothing to offer in return why keep you around? So I'm letting you go and saying goodbye. I know the holiday season is a tough time for this kind of news but I need your trade in value for some new games and an HD-DVD player. I know what you're thinking, "you're dumping me for an HD-DVD player?!? Aren't you the guy who wrote about not choosing sides yet?!?". You're right, I might end up with this generations Betamax but I've already switched it on more times this week than I've switched you on in the past 6 months. And don't forget it was 1/3 of your price and I got some games too, so there.
.
I wish you well PS3, give me a call when you turn 4. Maybe then we'll have something in common again.
.
Best wishes,
Terry
.

1 comment:

Eli the Mad (Beer) Man said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Good one! ;)