Ninjas Are Cool

With all due respect to Heidi Klum's personal masseuse, professional baseball players and Kathy Lee Gifford sweatshop workers, the coolest job in the world is being a Ninja. That's right, Ninja with a capital N. Why am I so into Ninjas? Its probably my admiration of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the old 80's TV show "The Master" starring Lee Van Cleef and Tim Van Patten, Ask A Ninja on youtube or the fact that I've been playing a lot of "Tenchu Z" for this week's review. Or maybe its the stealthy way they get around or all of their cool gadgets. Ninjas are the new pirates, so in order to be an informed consumer when the Ninja movie, throwing star toys, lunch boxes and underwear come out, here are some things you should know about the worlds coolest people.

.

Top 5 Things You Didn't Know About Ninjas And Will Be A Better Person Once You Know Them

.

1. Ninja as cheerleader - Don't believe me? Check out the synopsis of the movie "Cheerleader Ninjas", released in 1998.

.

"A group of matronly church going women mistakenly blame a group of local high school cheerleaders for the proliferation of pornography on the Internet. Throughout their attempt to defend themselves, the pom-pom-pushing Happy Valley High Hamsters learn of the nefarious plot of one Mr. X to use them as his sexy test group for his new Internet Zombie Domination software."

.

Now that's my kind of movie.

.

2. Ninja as gamer - A group from Sweden that goes by the name "Ninjas in Pyjamas" (crazy Swedes and their goofy spelling) formed a clan in 2001 that plays competitive matches of "Counter Strike". They're considered one of the best teams in the world...by other nerdy Swedes.

.

3. Ninja as Mel Blanc - Greg Eagles provided the voice work for Gray Fox, the cyborg Ninja from "Metal Gear Solid". But wait, there's more. Eagles has done a number of other voice over jobs as well. Besides providing the voice for Gray Fox, he also did the voice of DARPA Chief Donald Anderson. He did the voice of Luke Cage in "Marvel Ultimate Alliance" and Corporal Dell Morris in "Quake 4". Eagles also does cartoon voices.

.

4. Ninja as buffoon - Some quotes from the greatest Ninja movie ever, "Beverly Hills Ninja" starring Chris Farley.

.

- Haru: Hey, you hear the one about the lady who backed into a fan? It was a disaster. "Dis-assed" her.

- Haru: [Joey is chasing a chicken] Keep practicing, Joey, and someday you will choke that chicken.

- Sensei: Twenty five years ago, an ancient legend of this sacred art came alive. It spoke of a foreign child who would come among us and become a Ninja master unlike any other. How he arrived on our shores will forever remain a mystery. We Ninjas thought that this child would be the great white Ninja of the legend. We were wrong. We were very wrong.

.

Okay, so maybe Ninjas should stick to falling through tables and avoid making movies.

.

5. Ninja as deliver boy - The restaurant chain Ninja Burger is a group of Ninjas who secretly deliver fast food meals anytime, anywhere, within 30 minutes or less. If a Ninja fails to deliver on time they are required to commit Seppuku, also known as hara-kiri. The competition with Pirate Pizza, Otaku Bell and Samurai Burger is fierce. So maybe Ninja Burger is a parody website, but their dedication to the art of food delivery is impressive. If you're looking for a job, head over to http://www.ninjaburger.com/. Make sure you have your own Ninja sword and uniform.

.

coloradojoemail@yahoo.com

Old Reliable

Let's face it, when it comes to games, the last few months have been slow. I'm talkin' Paris-Hilton-learning-lessons-the-hard-way slow. Aside from the "Halo 3" beta, which wasn't even a real game, the last few months have positively sucked. And don't give me a bunch of crap about "Shadowrun" either. If you think that's a good game, its only because your choices lately have been garbage, crap and slightly better crap.

.

So what are you to do during a dry spell? What every other smart gamer does, go back to your "old reliables". These are the games you go to when you don't know what to play, if there's nothing new you want to buy, or you've gotten so tired of a game you can't even stand to look at it anymore and you're dying to trade it in. These games are always there to give you some fun, no matter how old they are or how many times you've played them. For some, its "Halo 2" (my brother Phil), for others (my buddy Eli) its "City of Heroes". Here are the games that keep me going when I have nothing else to play, share yours if you like.

.

GTA: San Andreas (Xbox) - I play at least 1 new game a week and sometimes I need to get the mediocre taste out of my mouth. San Andreas is my gaming mouthwash. Running people over without consequences, flying a Harrier and shooting rockets at passing cars, basejumping, gambling - this game has it all. A great way to relieve stress is running around a huge world where you can do whatever you want.

.

GTA: Vice City (Xbox) - What?!? Two GTA games, doesn't that get boring? Um..no, I play this one for a different reason. This is the funniest game I've ever played. The radio DJ's are hilarious, the dialogue is classic 80's cheesy ("Its time to do the Lance Vance dance!) and the sound track is a thing of beauty.

.

Midway Arcade Treasures 2 (PS2) - This is a recent addition and the only reason I have to turn on my PS3 right now. It has a nice compilation of classic Midway games but the one I bought it for was "Cyberball 2072", which as everyone knows, is the GREATEST-ROBOTS-PLAYING-FOOTBALL-GAME-OF-ALL-TIME! It brings back a lot of memories and its still fun to play. If only it were on Xbox Live Arcade, then I could get rid of it.

.

coloradojoemail@yahoo.com

The Review: Forza Motorsport 2

My palms are sweating and I’m on the edge of my seat. Its the last lap of a race in Laguna Seca and the driver behind me is all over me like a wet t-shirt. One mistake and he’ll pass me for sure. Hold him off, and fortune and glory is all mine. Welcome to “Forza Motorsport 2,” an engrossing, deep and beautiful racing sim.

.
Building a great racing video game is a tough task. They can come off as too cartoony (“Mickey’s Speedway USA”), silly (“Crazy Taxi”), stupid (“Pimp My Ride”) or just plain head scratching (“Star Wars: Super Bombad Racing?” Who thought this was a good idea?). With “Forza 2” Microsoft seems to be trying to compete with Sony’s “Gran Turismo” series, well known for its almost anal retentive attention detail but the game actually comes across as something better – a blend of “Gran Turismo’s” gift for customization and “Project Gotham Racing 3’s” easy pick and up and play driving controls. Put those two things together with “Forza 2’s” beautiful graphics and what do you get? A racing sim that everyone from hardcore gamers to noobs can enjoy.

.
There is so much to do in “Forza 2” (hey, that rhyms!) that its almost hard to figure out where to start. There’s a very deep exhibition mode where you can get familiar with the different tracks, race a variety of the different car types in either simulated races and time trials or just drive a lazy free run. The games multi-player component offers exactly what you’d expect from a Microsoft game, a great sense of community. There are online tournaments, races, Forza TV where you can watch a race, you can gift a car and send it to a friend and best of all there’s an auction house. Here you can buy and sell cars just like on ebay. Cool!

.
The heart of “Forza 2” is the career mode. You’ll start off by choosing a region, buying a lowgrade car and getting your race on. When you’re not racing and raising your driver level, you’ll be buying new cars and customizing them to an almost hilarious degree. Sure there are plenty of parts upgrades but most gamers will most likely become enamored with is the visual customization. There are tons of colors, logos, designs you can add to your vehicle to make it look like just about anything you want. Ever wanted to race with the General Lee or a car with Pringles logos all over it? Now’s your chance, it’s a blast to play with.

.
The game presentation is first rate. The cars look stunning, the tracks are beautiful and the audio is solid but where “Forza 2” truly shines is in the attention it pays to the little things. The crowd cheers as you zoom past the grandstands and they each move individually. The cars take minor damage, as bumpers fall off and windows break, adding to the sense of realism. Shadows from light poles and buildings reflect off of cars and dust spews when you veer off the road. The lighting is spectacular as the light reflects differently off the road depending on the position of the sun. Cones, when knocked out of place, will stay where they were hit for the entire race. They don’t respawn back to their original location.

.
Of course none of this would matter if the racing stunk, thankfully its as tough as you want it to be. The AI is completely adjustable to fit however good of a racer you are, but no matter what level you’re at, you’ll be challenged. The driving controls are laid out on the controller quite well so even if you don’t drop $130 on a racing wheel, you won’t feel like your missing out on anything.

.
So this game must be perfect, right? A wider mix of race tracks, some weather elements and a not so lame soundtrack would be nice but I’m being nitpicky. With over 300 licensed vehicles (and I’m sure more is to come through Xbox Live Marketplace) and enough drive time hours to keep Danica Patrick happy, you will never be bored with this title. If you like racing games, even a little bit, you need to take “Forza 2” for a spin.
.
Forza 2 Motorsport
Cost: $59.99
Players: 1-2 (8 Online)
Formats: Xbox 360
Category: Racing Sim
Rating: E (Everyone)
You take the good: Beautiful graphics, excellent racing controls, challenging AI, deep career mode, crazy amounts of customization, tons of licensed cars
You take the bad: Umm…its not free?
And then you have – The Grade: A

.

coloradojoemail@yahoo.com

The Mole: Smell ya later

Mac Daddy - Apple and EA recently announced that games will be coming onto the Mac platform starting in July with the release of "Battlefield 2142", "Command and Conquer 3", "Need for Speed Carbon", "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix". "Tiger Woods 08" and "Madden 08" will come out in the fall. id Software has developed a new gaming engine that supports OS X, PC, Xbox 360 and PS3. The new engine, called id Tech 5, will be on display at E3.

.

Sony reaches out - Finally starting to get with the program, Sony recently released its Playstation blog. Available at http://blog.us.playstation.com/ it offers news and updates. Like most things Sony does, its a bit cold and and not quite as community friendly as the Xbox site but if you're a PS3 gamer, its worth a look.

.

Grand Theft Auto trailer - For those of us diehard fans who salivated over the first GTA IV trailer and wanted more, there's good news. A new trailer titled "Looking for the Someone Special" will be available for download on the Rockstar website June 28th.

.

Did someone say Achievement Points? - Here are the 49 ways to boost your gamerscore in Halo 3.

.

1. Landfall - Finish the first mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 20 points

2. Holdout - Finish the second mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 20 points
3. The Road - Finish the third mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 20 points
4. Assault - Finish the fourth mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 30 points
5. Cleansing - Finish the fifth mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 30 points
6. Refuge - Finish the sixth mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 30 points

7. Last Stand - Finish the seventh mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 40 points
8. The Key - Finish the eighth mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 40 points
9. Return - Finish the final mission of the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary. 50 points
10. Campaign Complete: Normal - Finish the Campaign on Normal. 125 points
11. Campaign Complete: Heroic - Finish the Campaign on Heroic (unlocks achievement for Normal, if not earned). 125 points
12. Campaign Complete: Legendary - Finish the Campaign on Legendary (unlocks achievements for Normal and Heroic, if not earned). 125 points
13. Iron - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
14. Black Eye - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
15. Tough Luck - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
16. Catch - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
17. Fog - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
18. Famine - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
19. Thunderstorm - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
20. Tilt - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
21. Mythic - Finish the Campaign on Normal, Heroic, or Legendary, then find and claim this skull. 10 points
22. Spartan Program Recruit - Win your first game in matchmaking to sign up for the Spartan Program (Online). 10 points
23. UNSC Spartan - Earn your Sergeant rating to be recognized as a true Spartan (Online). 15 points
24. Spartan Officer - Advance to the Spartan Officer ranks (Online). 25 points
25. Two for One - Score a Double Kill with a single spartan laser shot in a ranked free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
26. Too Close to the Sun - Destroy an enemy banshee with the spartan laser or missile pod in a ranked playlist or in campaign. 5 points
27. Triple Kill - Kill 3 enemies within 4 seconds of one another in a ranked free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
28. Overkill - Kill 4 enemies within 4 seconds of one another in a ranked free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
29. Lee R Wilson Memorial - Score 5 grenade sticks in any ranked free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
30. We’re in for some Chop - Destroy an enemy vehicle with equipment in a ranked playlist or in campaign. 5 points
31. Killing Frenzy - Kill 10 enemies without dying in any ranked free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
32. Steppin' Razor - Score a Triple Kill with the sword in a ranked free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
33. Mongoose Mowdown - Splatter an enemy with the mongoose in a ranked free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
34. Up Close and Personal - Kill 5 enemies by melee or assassination in a ranked free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
35. Fear the Pink Mist - Kill 5 enemies with the needler in a ranked free for all playlist or in campaign. 5 points
36. Headshot Honcho - Kill 10 enemies with headshots in a ranked free for all playlist or in campaign. 5 points
37. Used Car Salesman - Destroy a vehicle that has three enemies in it in a ranked playlist or in campaign. 5 points
38. Marathon Man - Locate and access all Terminals in the Campaign. 40 points
39. MVP - Earn the MVP in any ranked playlist (Online). 5 points
40. Maybe Next Time Buddy - Board the same vehicle within 10 seconds after being boarded in any free for all playlist (Online). 5 points
41. Demon - Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on the second mission. 10 points
42. Guerilla - Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on the first mission. 10 points
43. Cavalier - Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on the third mission. 10 points
44. Askar - Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on the fourth mission. 10 points
45. Exterminator -Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on the fifth mission. 10 points
46. Ranger - Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on the sixth mission. 10 points
47. Vanguard - Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on the seventh mission. 10 points
48. Orpheus - Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on eighth mission. 10 points
49. Reclaimer - Score over points in the Campaign meta-game on the final mission. 10 points
.

Smell ya later? - So what the heck does the title of this post have to do with anything? Well, I don't know how to sugarcoat it so here it is - I recently resigned as the Gazette's video game columnist. To be honest its been a long time coming. No disrespect to the paper or any of the friends I still have there but I just didn't feel like it was taking my writing career where I wanted it to go. I left on my own (and good) terms so the decision to leave was completely mine and I'm happy with it.

.

Now I'm a freelancer with increased writing opportunities. The Gazette doesn't allow you to write for anyone else, but now that I'm "single" I can persue other outlets I couldn't before. I'll still be doing this blog, the podcast, going out to E3 and giving you the latest gaming news and reviews. I'm also looking to do some freelance work for the Independent and my name is in the mix at a couple of national gaming sites/mags so I have some jobs in the works. I'm bummed that I'm no longer affiliated with a reputable paper but if I want to play with the big boys, some risks have to be taken. Wish me luck as I take the next step in my career and don't go anywhere. If you've enjoyed what you've read over the last 2 years, it should only get better now that I'm not as restricted when it comes to content or style. I'm not turning into a different writer, just being a little less conservative. Stick around.

.

coloradojoemail@yahoo.com

Happy Father's Day

Greetings from the hottest place on Earth - Its a little late, but Happy Father's Day to all of those dads out there, both gamers and non-gamers. My dad is the one who got me hooked on gaming, although I'm sure it was completely unintentional. He's the guy who somehow came up with an Atari 2600 for our family when it was THE hot ticket Christmas item, and we lived in Germany at the time. How he pulled it off I'll never know but he always came through in the clutch around Christmas and birthday time. He also bought me a watch that had Space Invaders on it and played the song "La Cucaracha". Why it could do both of those things, I had no clue. Who knew that early intro to would lead to a lifelong love of gaming? Thanks dad, for everything.

.

In case you were wondering why I haven't put up any posts since Wednesday's review, I've been out of town. The wife and I left Wednesday afternoon and just got back today from a canoeing trip/astronomy class outside of Grand Junction aka, Phoenix North. It was a fun trip but I'm not going into details here. Let me just say it involved nudity (not my own), endless Uranus jokes, and a device called The Groover. If you're interested, listen to this weeks podcast as I'm going to be bringing it up in this weeks episode. Look for a Mole report on Tuesday and hopefully a belated "Forza 2" review on Thursday.

The Review: Call of Juarez

Will you answer? - Over the last few weeks the movie “The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift” (starring Lucas Black and kid rapper Bow Wow) has been on HBO about 379 times. At first, I didn’t pay attention to it knowing that it’s a part of the underwhelming “Fast and Furious” trilogy. But after catching parts of it here and there I started watching it, sometimes even TiVoing it, and suddenly it’s a decent movie. Or maybe I’m just bored.
.

The new shoot’em up western “Call of Juarez” is a lot like “Tokyo Drift.” It starts off disappointing; just another lame summer release to kill some time with while waiting for “Madden” and “Mass Effect.” But after working through it and getting used to it, a decent game is unveiled. Or maybe I’m just bored.
.

In “Call of Juarez” gamers take turns playing as Billy Candle, a screw up trying to clear his name, and Reverend Ray, Billy’s preacher uncle and a one time gunfighter ala Clint Eastwood in “Pale Rider”. Each character has their own unique skills and abilities. Ray is stronger and can kick and carry heavy objects. He wears armor, usually packs two six-shooters and has a bullet time-like feature called Concentration Mode. He can also blast bad guys with a gun in one hand while quoting scripture from a Bible in the other. Cool!
.

Then there’s the other guy. Billy can hide in bushes so he can’t be seen and can climb onto rocks and crates. He also uses a bow and arrow. Wow! Its like summer camp! Billy has no armor, which means he can’t take much punishment and has the effect of killing him if he falls five feet. In other words, he’s a wimp. Billyboy does have a whip that he uses to smack wolves and swing from branches onto ledges. This sounds like a cool Indian Jones-type feature but unless you nail your landing like an Olympic gymnast, prepare to fall to your death again and again. Not cool, and the games glaring flaw.
.

The uneven characters create off-kilter game play. For Ray life consists of running around the attractive looking environments, shooting the hats off bad guys and then finishing them off with a verse from the Book of Revelations. At the end of each level, there’s a quick draw duel with a boss. The Ray levels are fast paced and full of action. Since Billy isn’t as strong or as well armed, gamers spend most of their time skulking around, doing odd jobs like sneaking into his girlfriend’s house undetected or “permanently borrowing” some poor guys horse and not getting caught. There are the occasional fights and horseback rides (camp again!) but poor Billy just isn’t suited for it. While I appreciate a change of pace as much as the next gamer, the difference between the two characters is too great and slows the action, and fun, to a halt.
.

Despite the Dr. Jekyl/Mr. Boring game play, “Juarez” has a lot of other things to offer. The graphics are solid, the audio has nice sound effects and cheesy dialogue, there’s a lot to do when the single player is over (an enjoyable multi-player mode, a number of gun duels and extra non-story related missions) and the game has a unique game play setting – the old west.
.

“Call of Juarez” doesn’t reinvent the genre of the western first person shooter but it is a fun, goofy game with plenty to keep you busy. Better yet, its a good way to spend some time while waiting for the big guns this fall.
.
Call of Juarez
Cost: $49.99 - $59.99
Players: One (16 Online)
Formats: Xbox 360, PC
Category: First Person Shooter (FPS)
Rating: Mature (17+)
You take the good: Plenty to do, fun genre, Reverend Ray
You take the bad: Uneven game play, poor whip targeting system, Billy
And then you have – The Grade: B-

The Mole: John Elway Returns

The Duke of Denver - Johnny boy is back, this time on the cover of "All-Pro Football 2K8" joined by Barry Sanders and "Dancing with the Stars" and 49ers Hall of Famer Jerry Rice. I've seen some screenshots of this game and I certainly am intrigued. Will it fly without the NFL license? Only time will tell, but seeing a 30ish looking John Elway in a video game is something I'll have to check out. While we wait for its release, here is a partial list of some of the licensed tracks in the game.

.

1. "All-Pro Intro"
2. "Something Different" featuring Chali 2Na & Keno 1
3. "Sudden Death" featuring DJ Faust
4. "Let the Rhythm Hit ‘Em 2007" featuring Rakim & Chevelle
5. "Doin' It Like This" featuring Clutch
6. "Automatic At It" featuring Aceyalone
7. "Go Hard" featuring Gift of Gab & Dub Trio
8. "On My Side" featuring Lateef & Slug
9. "I Don’t Need This Trouble" featuring Natural Self
10. "Sure Shot" featuring Casual & Pep Love
11. "Rock, Shock, Break" featuring Backyard Bangers
12. "Locked and Loaded" featuring Deftones & Dead Prez
13. "Tom Sawyer (Z-Trip Remix)" – Rush

.

Dance card filling up - E3 is getting ever closer and I'm starting to feel more and more like a speed dater. I've been hit on by Microsoft, Sony, Majesco, Midway, Bethesda, Eidos and Codemasters and like a shameless hussy said yes to all of them. While this certainly will make me busy (when will I fit in a trip to Universal Studios?) I'm excited to see the new releases and pass on everything I find on this blog. Look for news and updates every day during E3 next month.

.

And finally - Ubisoft announced late last week that "Assassin's Creed" - to be released on the 360, Ps3 and PC - will be released this November...if you're interested in contributing to the coloradojoe podcast mailbag drop me an email at coloradojoemail@yahoo.com... normally I don't cover TV here but I feel obligated after watching the finale of "The Sopranos" last night. I know there's been some negative things written about it but I thought it was very good. It was very suspenseful the whole way through, we got to say good-bye to every character by seeing everyone one last time, the Phil Leotardo death was one of the most memorable ever and the during the last 5 minutes I was literally staring at the screen without blinking. The show didn't really end with the payoff everyone was hoping for, but for me, I didn't want to see Tony die or in jail because I like him (despite what a dispicable person he is). The way it ended was fitting, letting the audience imagine what happened and of course leaving the door open for a Sopranos movie. The only thing thing that disappointed me is AJ not getting clipped (not being able to get his seatbelf off when his car caught on fire would have been fine with me) because he's one of the most annoying characters in TV history.

Control This

While listening to a recent Major Nelson podcast, the subject of the top 5 best console controllers in the history of gaming came up (sure I said I was going to write a review of gametap, but after hearing this list, I couldn't hold my tongue). I'm not sure where Major got the list but after getting home and looking it up online, I found the exact same list on the CNET/UK forum. Here were the top 5 all time console controllers, according to some bloke, in no particular order.

.

SNES

Atari 2600

N64

PS2 Dualshock

Xbox 360

.

Personally I love top 5 lists, they're a great conversation starter and this one is no exception. Lets take a look at these one at a time.

.

SNES - Not a bad choice. I played so many Madden and NHL games on this system in college that I could probably still pick it up and play it like a pro. Fits well in the hand, simple button layout and everything was easy to reach. But if I was going to choose the best Nintendo controller, I'd take the original NES controller because it was so groundbreaking. It perfected the use of the D-pad, and had a simple, yet brilliantly effective control scheme. I loved playing Super Mario with this controller.

.

Atari 2600 - Great choice and certainly in my top 5. Sure it was stiff as a board, caused wicked blisters and could occasionally snap like a twig if a kid was overly aggressive with it (not that I would ever do that), but its a classic because it was a smooth transition from the arcade into the home. One button, one stick? Brilliant.

.

N64 - What the heck is this guy smoking?!? The N64 controller was one of the ugliest, most poorly designed controllers ever created! Just look at that picture up top. No, seriously. First of all, it was waaay to big, especially for kids. The yellow directional buttons were too small, the A and B button were too close to the yellow buttons, the stick was poorly placed and it looked like a boomerang. Its a piece of junk and just looking at it makes my eyes cross. My choice to takes its place? The Dreamcast controller. It was a little clunky but I loved the VMU, very innovative. Why hasn't anybody else done something like that?

.

PS2 Dualshock - I absolutely love this controller and I have no idea why Sony made some of the changes it did with the PS3 controller (no rumble, slick as snot trigger buttons) that just didn't work. The PS2 controller is almost perfect. Two analog sticks with a nice tactile grip, rumble in each hand, a solid D-pad, and the perfect triangle, square, circle, X placement. Sure it was missing a trigger and wasn't wireless but it was still terrific. My second favorite controller.

.

Xbox 360 - Now we're cooking with gas. When I first bought my 360 and opened up the package, one of the first things that caught my eye was the controller, a significant improvement on the two previous Xbox controllers. The 360 model has almost perfect weight and size, a surprisingly effective off-center analog stick placement, the traditional D-pad and four button layout, two solid triggers, a headset jack, a guide button to access other functions and best of all, its wireless. The only thing missing? A motion sensor ala the Wiimote. But I wouldn't be surprised to see it in future 360 controller iterations.

.

I know what you're thinking. Why isn't the Wiimote in your top 5? Its certainly not lacking innovation or creativity (rumble, motion and a speaker?!?) and will definitely be remembered long after the Wii has been retired. But because its only been out for less than a year its too hard to tell where it'll rank in the long run. That and on some games (Red Steel, Need for Speed, Far Cry, Marvel: Ultimate Alliance) it gets in its own way. Only time will tell if its top 5 material.

The Review: Shadowrun

After working my way through the long “Shadowrun” tutorial, I could hardly contain my excitement. I had just finished learning how to use some new weapons and gadgets, had an informed decision on which race I thought best fit my gaming style and learned how to manipulate the coolest magic tricks this side of Las Vegas. I was pumped! Then I jumped into a multi-player match and proceeded to get hit harder than Bobby Bacala in a Hobby Lobby, it was not pretty. Where had the differences between the races gone? How come this gadget I thought was cool turned out to be lame? How come there only seems to be one game type? Why is there no single-player to hone my skills? When a video game leaves you with more questions than fun, it’s a bad sign.
.

Welcome to “Shadowrun” a game loosely based on a pen and paper RPG from the late 80’s and the first title ever that allows Xbox 360 and PC gamers with Windows Vista to play against/with each other. In the game there are two rival factions, the RNA (a large corporation) and the Lineage (a rebel group), fighting for the control of magic – that’s right, magic. The big bad corporation wants to control magic (How? I have no idea) and the underdog Lineage wants everyone to have access to it. David Blaine couldn’t be prouder!
.

Game play consists of two teams of eight playing each other in one of three games. Capture the Flag, Defend the Flag, or Attrition (wipeout the other team). Since you can win any of the flag games by wiping out the other team, there really isn’t any variety. There are also a limited number of maps so after a few rounds the game starts to feel old. Unlike “Halo” where you play a game and then move to another match, the online games in “Shadowrun” are played in rounds, with the first team that gets to 7 wins being declared the wiener. In between rounds players can buy new weapons, tech or magic powers. This is the time to specialize your abilities and weapons, which is certainly a unique feature among online games.
.

But before you can even begin to start choosing sides on the ever important magic debate, you need to go through the tease that is the “Shadowrun” tutorial. Here you will learn about the different races (troll, dwarf, elf and human) and their strengths and weaknesses. You will also learn how to operate the different weapons (katana, minigun, sniper rifle, rocket launcher, rail gun, grenades) and some interesting tech toys (glider, enhanced vision, antimagic generator, super reflexes). In theory this sounds great, but in practice needs some fine tuning. Once online, the difference between the races is minimal but most gamers have already figured out the one race that has a slight advantage (elves because they’re fast healers and slightly quicker) and play as them. The weapons are standard shoot’em up fare and the tech weapons, with the exception of the Batman-like glider, aren’t very useful. Limited game play types, nondescript weapons and gadgets on a multi-player only game? Feel the excitement!
.

The one area where “Shadowrun” does shine is in the use of magic. There are a wide range of abilities and not only are they cool to pull off, they look great. Resurrect allows you to revive dead teammates (as long as their body hasn’t been vaporized). Tree of Life is just what it sounds like, a tree that replenishes health. Strangle is a spell that shoots out magical crystals that are great to block enemies. Gust allows you to force push enemies and grenades out of your way. Smoke temporarily turns you into a ghost so you don’t take damage. Teleport allows you to do a great Nightcrawler impression and Summon gives you the ability to create a monster that fights to the death for you.
.

These powers are fantastic to use and almost saves the game, almost. But besides the issues already mentioned, “Shadowrun” has too many other flaws (long load times, frequent lag, expensive for a multi-player only title, no way to differentiate between PC and 360 gamers for any kind of rub it in factor) for this to be a must-own game. I'm excited as anyone to see PC and console gamers go at it, but this just isn't the title for it.
.

Shadowrun

Cost: $49.99 - $59.99
Players: One (16 Online)
Formats: Xbox 360, PC (w/ Windows Vista)
Category: First Person Shooter (FPS)
Rating: Mature (17+)
You take the good: Cool magic powers, Solid graphics
You take the bad: Not much variety, laggy, long load times, pricey for online only

And then you have – The Grade: C

Paradise Found

Beauty has a name and her name is...Cyberball - Long ago 80's rock band Survivor once sang, the search is over, and it is, sort of. I have found my Excalibur, my Fountain of Youth and my Holy Grail, sort of. I have found "Cyberball", sort of. After receiving an email and a message on Xbox Live Arcade from two different gamers reminding me to fight the good fight and keep bugging game developers for the release of the greatest robots-playing-football video game of all time, my determination was renewed. I emailed my contact at Atari, the publisher of "Cyberball", demanding a response. I then went to the new release board to find out when the expected release date was and found to no surprise those dreaded letters, TBA. Then I noticed something I hadn't before. Instead of seeing Atari as the publisher, I saw the company creating the XLA version of "Cyberball" was Midway. I have no idea why this was but I didn't care, my faith was restored! I was going to be meeting with Midway reps at E3. I figured I'd just hold one of them hostage until they released "Cyberball" on Arcade and the world would rejoice!
.
Then, on a whim, I took a peek at the Midway website, figuring I might be able to find some info on the 360 Arcade release. I saw nothing. I did see the Classic Game Web Arcade at the bottom and decided to look around. There was "Joust" and "Root Beer Tapper" (already on XLA) and a few other games but no "Cyberball". Then I scrolled down and saw that Midway had released three volumes of classic arcade titles available on the Gamecube, PS2 and Xbox. What would it hurt to take a look? I checked out Volume 1 and found "Defender", "Rampage", "Joust" and a few others. I looked at Volume 3 and found "Super Off Road" (another arcade classic and must own) and "Hydro Thunder". Finally, I opened up Volume 2 and after scanning through "Mortal Kombat II and 3" and "Primal Rage" found what my eyes had longed to see - "CYBERBALL 2072"!!! Shazam!!! At long last it would be mine! Oh, yes...it would be mine. This game was released in October of 2004?!? How did I miss this!?!?
.
I immediately called my buddy Fritz at GameCrazy and they were out. I called GameStop and they had 2! I had them hold it and for $12 I made my best gaming purchase of the year. Sure its not on Xbox Live Arcade and I won't be getting any Achievement Points (well, not until it comes out on XLA) or playing against other gamers online but at least now I have a reason to turn on my PS3. And, as my buddy Dieter used to say, I'm as happy as a little girl. These are the days when gaming almost brings a tear to my eye, sort of.
.
Other stuff - Coming up Wednesday, a review of "Shadowrun" for the Xbox 360 and PC gamers with Windows Vista...coming up Friday, a look at gametap.com, the Xbox Live Arcade for PC gamers...the latest coloradojoe podcast is available on iTunes and on this website. If you'd like to contribute to a podcast mailbag, send your questions or comments to coloradojoemail@yahoo.com.
.
.
terry.terrones@gazette.com

The times they are a changin'

"Podcasting?" said my mother, "What the heck is that?" - Two years ago I had no clue what an MP3 player was. I knew it had something to do with digital music (something else that confused me) but I didn't know how it worked. I was like a caveman being given a digital watch who didn't know whether to put it on my ankle or eat it. Keep in mind I'm a guy who's dad had an 8-track player in his Chevy Nova and still has a small record collection. In the last two years I've bought a laptop, an iPod Nano (for me but later traded in), iPod Shuffle (for my daughter) a video iPod and now have my own podcast. Once I get hooked on something, I'm in all the way.

.

The new coloradojoe podcast is available on iTunes and here on this blog to the right. Its a little raw right now (its kind of obious I'm a writer and not a radio DJ) as my brother and I tinker with the format and length but I have big plans for it. Interviews will be a big part of the podcast. I plan on having some locals I know (the Gazette's Andy Wineke and Warren Epstein, KCMN DJ Tron Simpson, KKTV weatherman Ty Shesky), some gaming industry insiders (Treyarch's Jeff Zaring, OXM's Fran Reyes, Andy Shatz of TKO, GameDaily's Eli Shayotovich among others) and maybe even a few sports figures. Of course I haven't actually gotten around to asking any of these people yet (except Warren) but I think I can talk them into it. I also plan on posting any interviews I manage to strong arm people into at E3 on the coloradojoe podcast as well. And while this site is a gaming site, my brother and I plan on tackling not just gaming but movies, television, music and pop culture.

.

There should be some good stuff on the podcasts so please be patient as we work out the kinks, I think it'll be worth your time.

.

Misc. stuff - Some site regulars might also have noticed that there has been another addition to the site, some of my favorite youtube gaming clips. I'll be changing these periodically...A few new songs for "Guitar Hero III" coming out in the fall have been announced. Check 'em out - Paint It Black (by The Rolling Stones), Cherub Rock (by Smashing Pumpkins), Sabotage (by Beastie Boys), The Metal (by Tenacious D), My Name is Jonas (by Weezer), Knights of Cydonia (by Muse), Rock And Roll All Nite (as made famous by Kiss), School's Out (as made famous by Alice Cooper), Slow Ride (as made famous by Fog Hat), Cult of Personality (by Living Colour), Barracuda (as made famous by Heart)

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

PC vs. Console: Part 2

Two readers, Frosty (gamertag frostymelon) and John X (ub3rn006) weigh in on the console vs. PC debate.

.

John X - With a PC, you can choose your components. Yeah, there are alot of people that go out to a certain site and pay a premium for a premade system. But with your PC enthusiast, you have tons of parts to pick and choose from. And there are new parts and upgrades to choose from coming out constantly. If you have the money, you can upgrade every month or so. If not, you can buy the previous generation (in PCs, a generation is around a couple of months. In consoles, a generation is a few years) at a discounted price. Because CPU and GPU manufacturers are always coming out with new products, the older products drive sharply down in cost especially in the used market which you can find being sold and traded on several forums websites. I buy nearly all of my PC components used or "OEM" which saves me a ton of money. With consoles, you buy what you buy and that's it. You're stuck with it for a number of years until a whole new console comes out. This has it's good points and bad points. For example. If you buy a brand new PC, 2 years down the road, there are going to be games that your PC simply can't keep up with anymore. While on the console, 2 years down the road the games are still made specifically for your console. Next was supposed to be the bad point. I can't really think of one.

.

With PCs, the online community is huge and there are several games that have long time followers. In XBOX Live, there are a few games that retain a long following such as Halo 2, CoD 2, the Burnout Series. I dunno. At any given time, I can start CoD2 and see thousands of PC servers going on. Same for a large number of PC games. Plus, there are modded servers. The user community is able to make modifications to the games to make them better, more playable, more exciting, and sometimes suck more. I avoid the "suck" ones. Another point goes to the console for game compatibility because some companies hachoo *ubisoft* ahem...excuse me, make games for consoles and then make a poor attempt to try to port them to the PC. This results in a junk game on most PCs (unless all your stuff is a month or less old).

.

Another point on pricing. While it feels like alot of money to dump on a new console every couple of years, 400 for an Xbox 360 isn't bad considering that since I bought my original Xbox, I've probably spent 2500 or more on my PC upgrades and component swaps. Personally I really enjoy both. I think my PC and my 360 are a gaming combo bonanza. I can't say that one is better than the other. The PC can be used for so many types of gaming. I mean obviously there are alot more PC games than 360 or PS3 games or for any other type of console ever made. Tons and tons of different genres. Basically, if you have the know how, anything you can do with a console you can do with a PC except play a few games that are console exclusive. On a console you plug it in and everything works (most of the time), but even nowadays using a console takes some know how. Unless you are talking about the Wii...heh.

.

Frosty - I actually come out of the PC gaming world. The 360 is my first console since the old Sega Master days/daze (anyone remember the REAL Shadowrun?).

.

I have likes/dislikes with a console. One of my big dislikes - the sluggish analog sticks...FRUSTRATING in a fast paced shooter, even with sensitivity pegged at the 'high' setting. I thought I could bring my PC skills over to the console...but, soon found out that it's tough to move over - I was even warned by my fellow PC gamers that I will end up hating the shooter on a console. The good news is that I am not quite at that point, but frustration is slowly eroding patience.

.

I also don't like the fact that if something goes wrong with the console...there's not much I can do about. At least with a PC I can troubleshoot, and make my own repairs. The console...I have to deal with MS.

.

Likes about the console - the fact that I can plop my rear down on in the recliner, click on, and game away. And, the 360 has gone beyond being just a gaming box, so it gives me a ton of options for the total entertainment package. The 360 library is starting to grow in depth, so I have/will have a ton of gaming options to choose from - shooter, RPG, RTS, arcade, etc. Again, I can get all of this by turning the console on, and tossing a game into the drive (or a d/l from XBLA).

.

Following ub3rnoob and his post - the mod community. What a great addition to the PC gaming world. It's a shame that it doesn't (or can't?) spill into the console world, especially with titles such as Unreal Tournament being released over the summer. It's the mods that give the PC shooters a lot of life. I do not strictly play games on the console, I still toss in Q3A and game away...and I have no issue finding FULL rooms with Q3A, even this far down the road since it's release (still a great looking game, and great shooter). The reason for that is based around the mods and solid community that they built. So, when my frustration boils over from the console...I head over to the PC to help calm my nerves, and lower my blood pressure. And, up until my career started going full speed, I ran a computer hardware/software/overclocking review website, so stripping down a PC or adding components is second nature. Though, getting review product for free and going out to buy the hardware...two different scenario's...so the PC gets the occasional upgrade now. Another nice thing about the PC - free 'stuff'. A new map pack out for your favorite game? You'd just go to the companies website and d/l for free...but not on the console. I think a sad truth around this - we'll see this change on the PC side of life, too. A lot of companies are looking at what the console guys are doing, charging for this, that, and the other, and I think they realise that they can do the same for their PC games.

.

...both have pluses, both have minuses...I think in order to meet the needs of a true gamer - you need to do a little of both.

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Review: Shrek the Third

Shortest. Review. Ever. - "Shrek the Third" stinks, don't buy it. Only rent it if you're kid is a HUGE Shrek fan. I'm talking, kid-who-dresses-up-in-a-Shrek-costume-every-day-for-school huge. What's that?!? You want to know why?!? Fine!
.
With apologies to Activision, this just isn't a good game. The graphics are last-gen. The game play is repetitive and dull, with endless button mashing and no variety to speak of, the camera is horrible, the game is too easy to beat, the celebrity sound-alikes are atrocious (only John Cleese?), and worst of all the Shrek humor we're all used to is non-existent. This game isn't even rated properly. "Shrek the Third" is rated E10+ for cartoon violence and crude humor but no child over the age of 10 would find this game even remotely interesting. A more appropriate rating would be E7 or E8, if only it existed. Save you're money and stay away from this game.
.
Shrek the Third
Players: Two
Price: $29.99 - $49.99
Formats: Xbox 360. PS2, Wii, PC, DS, GBA
Category: Action
Rating: E10+ (Everyone 10 and older)
Grade: D
.
Top 5 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Shrek
1. First film to win an Academy Award for Best Animated Feature
2. The word Shrek comes from the Yiddish word that means "fear" or "terror".
3. Loosely based on the William Steig children's picture book of the same name.
4. Steven Spielberg originally wanted Bill Murray and Steve Martin to play Shrek and Donkey (Chris Farley was cast as the voice of Shrek but died before the film was completed so the role went to Mike Myers) but liked the finished product so much he changed his mind.
5. The Shrek line, "That'll do Donkey. That'll do." is a reference to the line, "That'll do pig. That'll do." from the movie "Babe".
.
A coloradojoe podcast?!? - That's right, I said it. I'm doing a podcast. I'm not even sure what it is exactly but I'm doing one. Here's the deal, after talking to my brother and deciding we had waaay to much to say about far too many topics (video games, movies, tv, music, sports, other guy stuff) we decided it would be fun to do a podcast. I've submitted the first episode and its been accepted by iTunes so look for it soon. The first one is very short and doesn't include my brother (and to be honest, its a little dull because I recorded it at 12:30 at night and I was tired after 3 hours of trying to figure out how the stupid thing worked) but look for it on iTunes by Friday. We'll be doing new episodes once a week and I hope you'll subscribe. Once its available and you want to download it, enter "coloradojoe" in the search author or title box to find it. If you're still having trouble, email me.
.
terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Mole: World's most popular sport? Nahh!

Ronaldingoatemybaby - Today EA announced its cover boys for "FIFA 2008", set to be released this fall on the Xbox 360, PS2, PSP, PS3, DS, PC and Wii. Two-time FIFA World Player of the Year Ronaldinho will be front and center, flanked by Sergio "St. Louis" Ramos, Miroslav "Don't get too" Klose, Andreas "I need some toilet paper because" Ivanschitz, Tranquillo "Tequila" Barnetta, Florent "Don't shout so" Malouda or Frank "Barbeque" Ribery, depending on what country you live in. This naturally leads to one question? Why doesn't the 29th ranked U.S. team have someone on the cover? Maybe its because they stink and only me and 3 other guys in this country actually care about the sport. Personally, I'd settle for Liverpool great Steven Gerrard but that's just me.

.

Filling up my speed dating card - After rejecting Majesco and Codemasters like Lindsay Lohan rejects Alcholics Anonymous, I set up my first E3 appointment today with Midway Games. My first questions to the Midway big wigs? When will we see NBA Jam and classic Spyhunter on Xbox Live Arcade and who came up with the brilliant Michael Vick/Mike Mexico dig in "Blitz: The League" and can I buy him a drink (if you have no idea what I'm talking about, google the name Ron Mexico)?

.

Oops, I did it again - After an intial release date of May 8, "Halo 2" for the PC was supposed to come out this Tuesday. And it did, sort of. Microsoft officially moved the date back again to May 31 but some stores are selling it anyway. According to gamespot.com, "Halo 2" for the PC is available on shelves at Circuit City and can be purchased on its website. I guess if you've been anxiously awaiting "Halo 2" for the PC, you know where to go.

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

PC vs. Console

See this beauty up here? This is the first system I ever played a video game on, the Atari 2600. I got one for Christmas as a kid when I lived in Germany. I have no idea how my Dad (he was in the Army) managed to get one but I loved it. The first night I had it, I played it for so long, the joystick gave me a giant blister on my left hand because I was gripping it so hard. When the home console craze faded out, I started playing games on an Apple IIe. I loved playing "Dr. J and Larry Bird Go One on One" and later "Jordan vs. Bird" on the Commodore 64. These are the early foundations of my love of gaming.

.

Why do I bring this up? After reading some comments on my "Halo 3 Beta" post from my buddy Eli (an Associate Editor at GameDaily) and long time reader John X, I got to thinking about the difference between PC and console gamers. Both types of gamers view the video game industry very differently and you could find guys on both sides who think one is better than the other. I have my own view on where I think the future lies for both PC and consoles (and despite the fact that I do mostly console reviews, I enjoy both) but I really want to open this up to everybody, so here's what I'm looking for - a public debate on which is better, console gaming or PC gaming. Let's call it Point/Counterpoint. I imagine Eli, John X and a few others of you are more than willing to voice your opinion on PC gaming so what I need is a reader (Frosty? General?) who would be willing to take a console gaming stance.

.

I seriously doubt this public debate will really give us a definitive answer on a long held argument, especially since gaming is a matter of personal preference, but at least it should be fun. Email me if you're up for this.

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Review: Halo 3 Beta

You know we're in a gaming drought when the beta version of a game is the hottest thing for the next-gen consoles in the last 4 months. Of course when that beta is for the next Halo game, how can you not get excited. Here are a few things I noticed while playing through 20 multiplayer games in the last two days.

.

The matchmaking setup looks new and fresh and has a significantly different functionality than the Halo 2 version. In the beta, the matches are limited to a maximum of six players and the games are Rumble Pit only for right now. Team Slayer, Team Skirmish and Big Team Battle will be available later. Besides looking aesthetically different, the menu offers a new Veto option. If players don't like the map or match type, a majority vote can change it. Once you're ready to play, gamers get matched up just like before but be prepared to wait, the load times were surprisingly long. When the other players have been selected, you can see other gamers rankings (1,7,15, etc.), but new to the ranking system is a military-style ranking ala Battlefield 2 (Corporal, Sargeant, etc). Its a little more accurate way of ranking someone because its two-tiered. The number ranking seems is representative of how many games you've played and done well (like the ranking system now) while the military designation is your skill in each individual game. Basically its the current ranking system done in a little more obvious way so that you and other gamers know how good you really are.

.

Alright, alright enough about the menu. How is the game play? In a word - SWEET! The control layout is essentially the same but there are a few changes. The Right Button, and Left Button if you're going to go dual, is what you use to pick up and reload weapons and get into vehicles. The X button is now used for equipment like the Tripmine, Bubble Shield, Power Drain and Grav Lift (more on those in a sec). Its a little odd at first, especially the Equipment button, but once you get used to it its more intuitive than the previous layout.

.

There are quite a few new toys to play with. The one new playable vehicle in the beta is the Mongoose, which is like an armored ATV that looks a lot like a one man Warthog. Its a blast to ride around in and gets you to places quickly but it offers no protection. You're a moving target because you can't shoot from it, so its only meant for quick transportation. The other weapons are (mostly) a lot of fun to experiment with. The Spartan Laser is devastating if you can time it right but its 5-second warm up can leave you vulnerable. The Machinegun Turret is very powerful but takes both hands and slows you down. My favorite weapons were the Spike Grenade and the Brute Spiker. As the name implies, when the Spike Grenade blows up metal spikes blast into anything near it. It is absolutely hilarious sticking one onto an unsuspecting gamer and watching them walk or stand around (because they can't see it), then get blown to bits. The Brute Spiker is nasty. It shoots metal spikes and when you dual wield it, you're almost unstoppable. It also has a blade at the end for a strong melee attack. I didn't get to try the MisslePod but I'm looking forward to it. My least favorite weapon is the Assault Rifle, which is what you spawn with. It doesn't do much damage, requires frequent reloading and after shooting the Brute Spiker, feels like shooting a BB gun.

.

The equipment is fun to use but takes time to adjust to. The Bubble Shield is very cool and can block firearms and explosions but watch out! Enemies can still walk through it and thump you. The Grav Lift is almost like a homemade elevator. You throw it down like a grenade and it can push you (or a vehicle) straight up over a wall or up to a high ledge. The Power Drain's a little trickier. Its used to wipe out an enemy's shield, allowing you to kill him easier, but its range is pretty limited. The Trip Mine is also new, but I had a hard time finding it and nobody used it on me, so I'm not sure how useful it is yet.

.

Three maps are available on the beta. I mostly played Highground (the laser tower is a great place to hole up) and a few times on Snowbound (don't go outside of the boundaries or you get shot by stationary turrets) but for some reason Valhalla never came up. Of the two I played, I enjoyed Highground best because of all the stealthy ways you can get around. Snowbound is much more wide open and has a few tunnels and shields that are fun to play with but sometimes you have to travel a ways to find people, especially in a 6-player only match. All of the weapons from Halo 2 were around (with the exception of the laser sword) but I did the notice cloaking shield didn't seem as effective as before.

.

Despite some complaints I've heard about the beta's graphics not quite being next-gen, I was impressed. While the visual effects weren't truly next-gen, especially when compared to the highly touted trailer, the game looked crisp. The weapons, environments and Spartan's all looked more detailed than normal. And considering the game doesn't come out until late September, there's plenty of time too pretty the game up. The audio, however, was exceptional! All of the weapons had their own unique sound and the background noises (it was great hearing gunfire from far away so I could tell where people were) are particularly tight.

.

A couple of other quick notes...the Saved Films, where you can save film of your game to watch later or send to friends is awesome. I sent one to my brother and he really got a kick out of it...There was some lag, which really surprised me considering the Halo series NEVER has any lag but hey, this is a Beta so I'm not too concerned.

.

So after all of that, does the beta deliver? Absolutely! I'm more stoked than ever about Halo 3. I like the controller layout changes, the new maps are sweet (well, two of them anyway), the new weapons and equipment are fun to use, and the tightened up ranking system is a great improvement. I know you don't need any reminding, but you better reserve this game now. I mean right now...seriously! Get off your couch and put your money down! If you only buy one Xbox 360 game this year, this should be it.

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

Master Chief vs. Napoleon Dynamite

Napoleon Dynamite is better than you and me - What does Jon "Napoleon Dynamite" Heder get to do that you and I don't? Besides hanging out with Pedro, hoarding tater tots and making millions of dollars for being a nerd...not that much. Oh yeah, he did get to go to the "Halo 3" red carpet premiere while you I were sitting at home watching TV.

.

I apologize for my three day absence but while thousands of American's were taking advantage of the new "Halo 3" beta, which started Wednesday, I was out of town for work. And when did I leave town? Early Wednesday morning of course. I did manage to get up at 6am and jam my "Crackdown" disc into my Xbox 360, ready to enjoy 30-40 minutes of game time before I had to leave my house. Unfortunately, the "Crackdown" beta download was having some problems and I couldn't try it before I left! Gaah!!! Starting tomorrow (waaaay too tired to start tonight after getting home at 8pm) I'll be giving the beta a NFL combine-sized workout. Look for a post on Sunday. Be prepared to share your thoughts.

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Review: Spider-Man 3

Halfway through “Spider-Man 3” the movie I was pretty happy. I was thinking to myself “Hey, this is pretty good. Its not Spider-Man 1 good but this is as good as Spidey 2”…then the last half of the movie happened and suddenly I’m watching that last crappy Batman with George Clooney and Arnold Schwarzenegger.

.
Unfortunately “Spider-Man 3” the game feels the same way. At first it just feels good to be swinging through skyscrapers and thumping costumed goons again. But the longer you play the game, the more the problems with it get on your nerves until finally you’re initial excitement is gone.
.

Does this mean the “Spider-Man 3” video game isn’t worth your time? Absolutely not, there’s a lot in this title, especially for us die-hard fans. But if you don’t have Spidey blinders on, the glitches in the game will make you angrier than J. Jonah Jameson.
.

If you’ve played Spidey games before, you know what to expect in this version - swinging around town in a sandbox environment, choosing missions at your own leisure and stopping random crimes as you cruise around the city. The game ties loosely to the movie as Sandman, New Goblin (horrible name by the way) and Venom all make an appearance. Lizard, Scorpion and a few others show up as well. Pretty much what you’d expect, and that’s the problem.
.

“Spider-Man 3” looks and plays almost exactly like “Spider-Man 2” with an almost identical combat system and, with the exception of the city, no visual upgrades to speak of. When my non-game-playing wife thinks they’re the same game, that’s not good. This isn’t a horrible thing because Spidey 2 was so good, but come on! This is supposed to be a next-gen title but the collision detection issues, poor looking character models and enemies that like to get stuck in walls give the game an unfinished feel.
.

This isn’t to say that “Spider-Man 3” doesn’t have its strengths. The contextual mini-games (where gamers hit buttons that match up to activities onscreen, ala “God of War”) are a nice new addition, there’s a ton of content to play through (at least 25 hours worth), the audio is solid (Tobey Maguire, James Franco, JK Simmons Thomas Hayden Church and Topher Grace are all in the game) and swinging through the city never gets old. And again, you get to play as the greatest superhero ever.
.

Still, just like the movie you’ll feel that something isn’t quite right, that something is missing. Whether you can see past these flaws depends on your point of view. For a man who once dressed as Spider-Man for Halloween for four straight years (and I’m saying if I was an adult or not during that time), I can overlook these flaws. For everyone else, it might be a giant Sandman-sized distraction that can’t be overcome.

Spider-Man 3
Cost: $29.99 - $69.99
Players: One
Formats: PS3, PS2, Xbox 360, PC, Wii, DS, GBA
Category: Super Hero Fighter
Rating: T (Teen)
Grade: C+ (B- for us webheads)

.

And one more thing - The Halo 3 beta starts up at 6am tomorrow morning and I'm going to try get up right at 6 and try it out. Since I'm not a morning person, the word "try" is the key word in that last sentence. The odds I'll actually be able to do it? 50/50

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

.

Quick update - Just got a late night email from my contacts at Microsoft letting me know that the release date for "Halo 3" will be September 25. There was also something about a new "Halo 3" Zune going on sale June 15 for $249 but who cares. I don't know anyone who owns one of those things anyway.

The Mole: Making it Rain

Grab an umbrella - After scrolling through some recently released screenshots of "PGR4" (see above) I had to look out my window to make sure I didn't need a raincoat. The new Dynamic Weather System is stunning and can really effect the outcome of a race. Running into an unexpected rain storm or snow flurries during the middle of a race (and dealing with the accompanying change in physics) should be a blast.

.

"PGR4" also has a few other new features. The new career mode will offer gamers a more in-depth experience as fans will now be more actively involved. Drivers have their own fanbases that cheer them on and react to the action during the race. The Kudos system has also been revised. Drivers will now pump their fists when blowing by an opponent and in general display more emotion. A complete vehicle list hasn't been released yet but here are a few cars that have been confirmed.

.

2004 TVR Sagaris
1965 Chevrolet Corvette Sting Ray
2005 Vanwall GPR V12

1993 Toyota Supra Turbo
2005 Gumpert Apollo
1997 Panoz GTR-1 Coupe
2006 Ferrari 599 GTB Fiorano
1957 Maserati 250F

.

I wanna rock - Sony "Guitar Hero 2" owners will be getting some love this summer with "Guitar Hero 2 Rocks the 80's," new content exclusively for the PS2 version of the game. Gamers will have access to new venues, new characters, new guitars and 30 new songs from one of my favorite music era's - the 1980's. Check out a few of the songs confirmed for "Rock the 80's" below, and I dare you not to think of "The 40 Year Old Virgin" when you see the last one.

.

I Wanna Rock (by Twisted Sister)

I Ran (by Flock of Seagulls)

Round and Round (as made famous by Ratt)

I Want Candy (as made famous by Bow Wow Wow)

Metal Health (as made famous by Quiet Riot)

Holy Diver (as made famous by Dio)

Heat Of The Moment (as made famous by Asia)

.

Etc... - Sega announced "Condemned 2: Bloodshot", the sequel to the popular psychological terror, first person action thriller "Condemned: Criminal Origins" will be released in early 2008 on both the Xbox 360 and PS3...the "Forza Motorsport 2" demo is available on Xbox Live..."Double Dragon" was released for XBLA this week...I was planning on running my "Spider-Man 3" review today but haven't had enough time with the game. Look for that early next week...AND FINALLY...as of this posting the "Halo 3" beta is only 3 days, 17 hours and 55 minutes away. Not that I check the counter at Bungie.net 4-5 times a day or anything.

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Road to Santa Monica

E3 2007 is only two months away and as my buddy Dieter likes to say - I’m as happy as a little girl. The chance to see the hottest, yet-to-be-released titles, rub elbows with the worlds best gaming journalists, bow at the feet of Hideo Kojima and hear from each console maker how their latest creation will revolutionize the world of entertainment is too great of an opportunity to pass up.

.
While going to a video game convention in southern California sounds better than Space Camp, just getting to E3 requires a lot of planning, hard work and money. Step one was getting an invitation to an event that is now media exclusive, pretty tough to come by for a guy who writes for a mid-sized paper so far from Cali. Thankfully Activision hooked me up, after a lot of begging and pleading.
.

Step 2? Getting there. This sounds pretty simple but because I have to pay my own way, time and money become an issue. Time because I have to make arrangements for my kids, find someone to watch my dog Butters, bribe my brother to housesit and take time off of work. Money, because California is stupid expensive. I just booked my hotel last night and found out that the state of California has a 14% lodging tax! 14%!!! I can’t wait to pay for a $5 gallon of gas. Stupid Governator.

.
Since I’ve been dropping so much coin anyway, my wife and I decided to make a little vacation out of this business trip. We’re heading out a day before and staying two days after the three day event. What will we do on the off days? I don’t know and I don’t care. If my wife is patient enough to let me drag her to LA while I go to a video game convention, we can do whatever she wants. What I do care about is maximizing my time during the event and people are already starting to try and fill up my day planner.

.
So far I have received emails from Majesco (Bomberman and Bloodrayne series) and Codemasters (TOCA Touring Car series and Colin McRae Rally) and its not even June. Of course, I want to talk to the big guns. OXM’s Francesca Reyes and Paul Curthoys, Gamehead’s Geoff Keighley, PSM’s Chris Slate, Kojima (I’d crap my pants if I could swing that one), Microsoft’s Peter Moore, Nintendo’s Reggie Fils-Aime, Rockstar’s Sam Houser, Shigeru Miyamoto (I’d need some Depends and a translator for that interview), G4’s Morgan Webb (Yowza!), EA’s Trip Hawkins, Major Nelson…the list goes on and on. Since I’m pushy, I’m sure I can nab one of those.
.

Naturally the big three console makers are going to be holding their own press conferences off site, and they’re invite only as well. So I’ll need an invite on top of the invite I already have. I think I have a snowball’s chance in Phoenix of getting invited to Nintendo and Sony’s shindig. Nintendo has never shown me any love and I’ve dissed Sony a little too much and work for too small a paper for them to bother with me. But Microsoft? I think I’ve got a good shot at making that one.
.

So what’s in it for you? Plenty. You’ll be right there with me the whole time. Not literally of course, but figuratively, that would be uncomfortable. In fact, this is better for you than it is for me since you don’t have to share a hotel room with me (I snore like a bear) and you don’t have to pay for anything. Although I will accept cash donations. You’ll be getting first hand reports from someone who’s just as much of a fan as a writer. I’ll be posting articles and pics everyday (I’m borrowing my brother’s digital camera, he just doesn’t know it yet) and since I come from a small paper in a relatively small town, maybe someone will pity me and give me a scoop.
.

Well, someone better or I’m going to want my money back.

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Mole: Put some spring in your step

Xbox Live Update - Tomorrow Microsoft will offer up its Spring update for Xbox Live. While game updates are frequent occurrences for Xbox 360 games (and 3 day waits after you've turned on a PS3 for its console update), Live updates don't happen all that often. So what will it mean for 360 gamers? A weekly Bill Gates video chat? A cool, new Cyberall theme? No, a few minor changes of course, but what Microsoft is touting most is its new (yawn!) instant messaging feature as the big new. Forgive me if I'm underwhelmed. Maybe its due to my age or the fact that I just don't text that much but I don't see this as that big a deal. I am looking forward to a few of the other changes this update will bring.

.

- Chat via instant messenger with up to 20 contacts in a single conversation, and have up to six different conversations at the same time with people on PCs, mobile phones and other Xbox 360 consoles.
- Instant message while playing games, listening to music or watching movies or TV shows downloaded from Xbox LIVE Marketplace (If anybody did this while I'm watching a movie with them, I'd kick 'em)
- View at a glance if friends on Windows Live Messenger have gamertags and add them to a unified friends list. (Sounds interesting)
- Utilize the virtual keyboard on the Xbox 360 to text chat or connect a USB keyboard to the console. Launching later this summer, the Xbox 360 text-input device accessory will connect directly to the controller to support instant messaging. (What about using the keyboard for games?)

- On-screen pop-ups that immediately display the name and gamerscore value of a just accomplished Achievement, allowing gamers to see their progress without leaving or pausing the game. (Finally!)
- An even safer way to communicate through Xbox LIVE with enhanced family settings that enable different default settings for video chat and voice chat. (Lets get rid of those cursing punks on Halo2!)
- A new, standalone Xbox LIVE Marketplace blade houses all Xbox LIVE Marketplace content in one easy to navigate space.
- Xbox LIVE Arcade enhancements that showcase what games friends are playing directly from the friends list. Boasting about high scores, comparing progress and checking out leaderboards are all easier now as well. (Yes! I love arcade games.)
- Faster access to free, trial version of Xbox LIVE Arcade games through an improved Auto Downloads feature.
- The ability to fast-forward, pause and rewind video as it is being downloaded on Xbox LIVE Marketplace.
- Owners can now set their consoles to turn off after downloading content from Xbox LIVE Marketplace to help save energy, and download speeds have been increased. (I'll use this.)

- A date with Jessica Biel for the 1 millionth download starting at 12am EST tonight.

.

Okay, so maybe I made that last one up but you get the point. The best online service just keeps getting better. If only Cyberball was available on Xbox Live Arcade, then it would be almost as perfect as Jessica Biel.

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Review: Command and Conquer 3 Tiberium Wars

The year is 2047 and iPod’s have taken over the world as our human overlords. In order to keep running, the iPod army needs a precious crystal called Tiberium. This gives them a battery life of longer than 4 hours (we all know that 15 hour advertised battery life is a bunch of bunk). Humans are forced to mine this crystal which serves as fuel source and paradoxically as a devastating environmental hazard. But hope springs eternal as Sawyer from “Lost,” the guy who does the voice of Sam Fisher in “Splinter Cell,” the hot chick from “Battlestar Galactica,” and Lando Calrissian are fighting for humanity.

.
Okay, so maybe that’s not quite the plot from “Command and Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars” but its not that far off. All of the above listed actors - Josh Holloway, Michael Ironside, Tricia Helfer and Billy Dee Williams - do have significant roles in this fun game and while the storyline is a tad far fetched (and reeks of more environmental overtones than an Al Gore documentary) "C&C3" certainly is fascinating and really gets gamers engrossed in the latest offering from EA’s popular series.

.
For the uninitiated, the “C&C” franchise is an RTS (real-time strategy) series that dates back to 1995. The original "Command and Conquer" was one of the very first RTS's (1992's "Dune 2: The Building of a Dynasty" is widely accepted as the first ever RTS game). In “C&C3” you play as a battlefield commander whose goal is to defeat opposing armies with your military might and superior strategizing skills. Gamers play as one of three factions – the more mainstream Global Defense Initiative, the underground Brotherhood of Nod (which sounds like something from a Monty Python movie) and later as the alien Scrin.
.

Game play is standard RTS fare. Constructing bases, training a wide variety of combat units and battling your enemy to the point of extinction is what’s on the agenda. What makes “C&C3” different is the depth in which you do it.

.
There are 35 different single-player missions to jump into, a wide range of powerful weapons to use, a sweet online component that’s almost a game by itself and the option to choose different AI playing styles. The game presentation is top notch, with beautiful graphics that will make you drool. Large vehicles look spectacular and menacing. Individual units are painstakingly detailed and even though they are small, move impressively. The game really shines during large battle sequences that fill the screen with smoke, lasers and explosions. Throw in the impressive cast with a fascinating story line (with 90 minutes of live action video) and an incredibly intuitive interface and you have one addicting game.

.
Whether you’re new to the RTS genre or a longtime fan, you need to check this game out. It’s a blast to play and in this current dry season for hot new releases, it’ll keep you busy for a long time.
.
Command and Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars
Price: $49.99 – $59.99
Rating: T (Teen)
Category: Real Time Strategy
Players: 1-8 (8 online)
Formats: PC, Xbox 360
Grade: A
.
Top 5 Things You Didn’t Know About Michael Ironside
(General Jack Granger in “C&C3” and voice of Sam Fisher)
1. Born Frederick Reginald Ironside in Toronto, Canada.
2. Makes guys heads explode in the 1981 sci-fi classic “Scanners”
3. Was a successful armwrestler in his teenage years.
4. Have I ever mentioned he played Jester in “Top Gun”?
5. Lost his left arm in two movies (“Starship Troopers”, “Total Recall”).

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Mole: Pikachu still makes money?

Pika-ching - Nintendo recently announced that Pokemon Diamond and Pearl have sold more than 1 million copies in the United States since their recent release. How the heck is this possible? In Japan? Sure, I get it. Those guys are nuts for this kind of garbage. But in the United States?!? I just don't get it. But I guess that's why I'm not rich. Maybe if I came up with one of the most annoying franchises of all time (that just so happened to sell 155 million copies since 1996) maybe I'd have more than $20 in my checking account. Or maybe I should quit putting money on the Nuggets during the playoffs. Its one of those of two.

.

Ooops! - Remember that Marvel Ultimate Alliance content download I said was available a few weeks ago? Well evidently there were some problems with it that have now been fixed. Gamers can NOW download The Incredible Hulk, Nightcrawler, Cyclops, and Hawkeye in the Hero pack or get Magneto, Sabretooth, Venom and Doctor Doom in the villain pack. Each pack costs 500 points or you can get both for 800. Its overpriced and about 3 months late but if you're still into the game, it might be worth it.

.

What?!? PS3 News?!? - Don't get too excited but Sony has recently put free demos for Ninja Gaiden Sigma and Virtua Tennis in the PlayStation store. If only they'd put a Pa Rappa the Rappa download up, then I might be interested.

.

Etc. - EA Mythic recently announced that Warhammer Online has been delayed until first quarter 2008...An update for PS3's MotorStorm will be available in mid-May, it supposed to address issues with FAME rankings, buddy lists and matchmaking...If you haven't seen it yet, check out the trailer for Call of Duty 4: Modern Warefare. Its pretty sweet and moves the series into the modern age. http://www.gametrailers.com/gamepage.php?id=4735

.

terry.terrones@gazette.com

The Rant: Spider-Man vs. Superman

"He (Marvel Comics publisher Martin Goodman) gave me 1,000 reasons why Spider-Man would never work. Nobody likes spiders; it sounds too much like Superman; and how could a teenager be a superhero? Then I told him I wanted the character to be a very human guy, someone who makes mistakes, who worries, who gets acne, has trouble with his girlfriend, things like that. (Goodman replied,) 'He's a hero! He's not an average man!' I said, "No, we make him an average man who happens to have super powers, that's what will make him good'. He told me I was crazy".
-Stan Lee, 1986
.
I know what you're thinking. Isn't this a video game blog? Not today. Not with a Spidey movie and game coming out this Friday, it brings up too many powerful memories. Spider-Man has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. When I was a kid, my friends and I would share Spidey comics and buy them on the cheap from wherever we could. Yard sales, swap meets and flea markets were the best places to find deals. Eventually I managed to get my hands on a compilation book that contained the first few issues that showed how Spidey got his powers, how he dealt with Uncle Ben's death and being an ostracized nerd at his high school in New York. It was addicting stuff then, as it is now, and just for the reasons that Stan Lee listed above. Spider-Man's everyman persona is different from almost every superhero in existence. Spidey is the epitome of the word underdog. A lovable loser who can't catch a break but manages to fight through incredible odds with an amazing combination of determination and heart. Isn't this the kind of person we can all relate to?
.
This of course leads to the question - who is the best superhero ever? While Batman is certainly in the conversation the debate naturally comes down to Superman and Spider-Man. Sure there are plenty of other great heroes out there who you deserve some love. Almost everyone can relate to the Hulk's blinding rage and I've always found The Flash, Green Lantern, Wolverine and Iron Man fascinating. And while I never read a Wonder Woman comic, I sure did enjoy the TV show with Lynda Carter. Meow! But no one in the history of superheroes compares to the Man of Steel and the Wall Crawler. Which one is better? You already know my stance but allow me to prove it in.
.
1. Superpowers - Superman is an omnipotent being with boundless powers. He can fly, has heat vision, freeze breath, can move with incredible speed, and is immune to just about everything except pretty green rocks. Spidey on the other hand can only climb walls, has great agility and strength and (in the comics anyway) can make web fluid by mixing chemicals together.
Edge: Spider-Man because eventually one of those radioactive spiders that I have biting me every week is going to work. The chances of me landing on another planet and gaining infinite powers? Zero.
.
2. Love interest - The Man of Steel has Lois Lane, a fiery newspaper columnist and Lana Lang, a high school cheerleader. Peter Parker has been busy with Gwen Stacy, Betty Brant, Felicia Hardy, and Mary Jane Watson.
Edge: Spider-Man. Even though Kirsten Dunst is an even bigger wet blanket than Margot Kidder, Spidey is a George Clooney sized player compared to the Man of Steel.
.
3. Backstory - Superman: Alien kid sent here by his parents because his planet was about to blow up. Spider-Man: High school kid bitten by a radioactive spider, driven to be a vigilante after letting the man that eventually would kill his uncle get away during a robbery.
Edge: Spider-Man. The current political regime is against illegal aliens making a living in our country, making Superman a lawbreaker.
.
4. Biggest nemesis - Superman: Lex Luthor a bald, earthling with no superpowers and daddy issues who happens to be really, really smart. Spider-Man: The Green Goblin, a chemically altered freak with lots of toys. Think Barry Bonds on a hover board.
Edge: Spider-Man. The only bald people who should ever scare you are Sinead O'Connor and the lead singer of Midnight Oil.
.
5. Biggest weakness - Superman: the aforementioned pretty green rocks. Spidey: Underwear that rides due to overly snug costume.
Edge: Spider-Man. A wedgie is a lot easier to overcome than severe allergies.
.
6. Movie offerings - Superman: Five movies. Two good ones (Superman I, II), one so-so one (last years Superman Returns) and two that should never see the light of day again (Superman III, IV). Spidey: Two wildly popular movies starring Tobey Maguire that made a combined cagillion dollars.
Edge: Spider-Man. Any movie that can ruin a once great comedians career (Richard Pryor is Superman III) lowers the overall value of the franchise.
.
So there you have it, when it comes right down to it the Man of Steel is no match for the Web Slinger. Sure Spidey might get his butt kicked in a straight up fight, but when it comes to who is the more likable hero, Spidey comes out on top.
.
terry.terrones@gazette.com